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Lovestruck!

Posted May 2nd, 2019, 10:38 AM IST

Lovestruck!

The best part of dating someone a decade older than you is that they can make you feel super special and important all the time. Just look at George Clooney, Farhan Akhtar and Arjun Rampal who are permanently on lovestruck mode. Among the ladies, Priyanka Chopra is super affectionate with her much younger hubby Nick Jonas while Malaika Arora is all smiles these days after divorcing hubby Arbaaz and hanging out with Arjun Kapoor. Sushmita Sen, whose boyfriends have always been younger than her, also looks very happy with her much younger boyfriend Rohman Shawl.

Rohan Shaw and Sushmita Sen
Rohan Shaw and Sushmita Sen





Interestingly, seems like the older partner is always making a huge effort to make his/her significant other feel special, and going all out to give them the kind of importance that a partner of the same age seldom gives.

Arjun Kapoor and Malaika Arora
Arjun Kapoor and Malaika Arora

Farhan Akhtar is in the news frequently for being all over girlfriend Shibani Dandekar, even posting images of them frolicking on the beach and being quite public about being smitten by her. Similarly, at the Variety Power of Women event where he was addressing a room full of people, George Clooney introduced himself as human rights lawyer Amal Clooney's husband. He is so proud of her achievements and seems to be following her path in making political statements like asking people to not stay in hotels owned by the Sultan of Brunei because of the latter’s homophobia.

Yet another person on this lovestruck bandwagon is Arjun Rampal, who is seen everywhere with his girlfriend Gabriella Demetriades. The former model even took to Instagram recently to announce how blessed he is to have his pregnant girlfriend in his life even though his divorce is yet to come through.

Arjun had broken the news of Gabriella’s pregnancy on social media by sharing a picture of her .
Arjun had broken the news of Gabriella’s pregnancy on social media by sharing a picture of her .

In contrast, younger men like Ranbir Kapoor, Varun Dhawan, Vicky Kaushal and Ranveer Singh are very private. Rumour has it that Vicky is good friends with Katrina Kaif but there is not a single picture or word from his side. Ranbir on the other hand, was upset when pictures of him with then girlfriend Katrina Kaif on a beach in her bikini were made public. Meanwhile, Varun may be seen everywhere with his long term girlfriend Natasha Dalal, but is never all over her in public. Nor will you ever find Ranveer Singh being clingy with Deepika.

Priyanka Chopra Nick Jonas
Priyanka Chopra Nick Jonas

So why do older men and women try so hard or make such a huge effort the second time round with partners way younger than them?

Delhi-based relationship counsellor Gita Khanna explains, “With young people, relationships are under wraps because they are not sure if this is the one or whether it would even work out. They like to keep their options open. Also there is no insecurity. When the 40-plus individual gets hold of arm candy or a catch, they feel, ‘I can’t get better than this. Won’t let him/her go’. They feel they have scored big.”

Age no bar
Gita also says that the older partner feels the need to work on the passion and make sure their love interest knows and feels it too. “They do not want them to say after a couple of years that ‘You are now too old for me or there is no passion left’ because people age. When a young Saif Ali Khan married Amrita Singh, he did go against his disapproving parents, but was never as smitten as he is now with the young Kareena. He is always supportive of her and constantly acknowledges how great she is,” Gita points out.

Sociologist Professor Daniel David of Madras Christian College says another big plus point for the older crew, especially celebs, is that their relationship now becomes the talking point and thus, they stay relevant. Malaika Arora now makes headlines because of her alleged relationship with a 15-year-younger Arjun Kapoor. Priyanka Chopra is mostly in the news because of Nick Jonas and Arjun Rampal’s career is not making any headlines. A younger partner keeps you current and in the news, and basically gets you a new lease of life.

The paranoia of losing your grip on the opposite sex as you age is also there, says Professor Daniel. In the case of George and Amal Clooney, she is as well connected and happening as George, and has age on her side, which is great motivation for him to make the effort to be with her, besides the fact that it would be so hard to find a replacement for Amal.

The advantage of dating someone with whom you share a huge age gap is that they are truly ready to settle and know they are lucky to have you. They have explored the world of relationships and know how to value what they have finally got. You don’t have to look much further than former model Jerry Hall, who looks so much more content with her older husband, media tycoon Rupert Murdoch than she ever did with Rolling Stones frontman Mick Jagger, who is much closer to her in age.

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